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<h1><a href="https://archiveofourown.org/works/28389159">Twilight's Evil Detector</a> by <a class='authorlink' href='https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bendyfimfiction/pseuds/Bendyfimfiction'>Bendyfimfiction</a></h1>

<table class="full">

<tr><td><b>Category:</b></td><td>My Little Pony, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Genre:</b></td><td>Adult Content, Comedy, F/M, Human, POV Second Person, Random - Freeform</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Language:</b></td><td>English</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Status:</b></td><td>Completed</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Published:</b></td><td>2020-12-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Updated:</b></td><td>2020-12-28</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Packaged:</b></td><td>2021-05-18 03:09:31</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Rating:</b></td><td>Mature</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Warnings:</b></td><td>No Archive Warnings Apply</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Chapters:</b></td><td>1</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Words:</b></td><td>2,236</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Publisher:</b></td><td>archiveofourown.org</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Story URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/works/28389159</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Author URL:</b></td><td>https://archiveofourown.org/users/Bendyfimfiction/pseuds/Bendyfimfiction</td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Summary:</b></td><td><div class="userstuff">
              <p>Twilight invents an 'Evil Detector'. Things get awkward when she uses it on you.</p>
            </div></td></tr>

<tr><td><b>Kudos:</b></td><td>3</td></tr>

</table>

<a name="section0001"><h2>Twilight's Evil Detector</h2></a>
<div class="story"><div class="userstuff module">
    
    <p>Princess Twilight Sparkle’s friends (except for Spike, he was off doing something, nothing important) awaited patiently for her to announce her latest invention, while they sat around the Cutie Map, also known as the conference table. You, the human called it the conference table, due to “Cutie Map” sounding kinda girly.</p><p>You were sat on Spike’s chair at the conference table, dressed in a fine black tuxedo. Rainbow Dash was sat nearby on your right flank. Followed by; Pinkie Pie, Starlight, Rarity, Applejack. And then finally Fluttershy, who was sat on your left side.</p><p>Just in front of Twilight’s seat on the opposite side of the conference table to you was what appeared to be a small, soccer ball like object covered in a white sheet.</p><p>“Urgh! How much longer do we have to wait?” complained Rainbow.</p><p>“Exactly one second.” said Pinkie Pie with a jamaican man’s accent for some reason.</p><p>Everyone turned around as there came a ‘whoosh’ sound when an automatic steel door slid open to reveal none other than Princess Twilight Sparkle, who was wearing a white lab coat.</p><p>“GOOD NEWS, EVERYPONY!” shouted Princess Twilight, trotting in with her two front hooves raised high in the air for a brief moment. “I’m about to announce my latest invention.”</p><p>“Well duh.” said Rainbow.</p><p>Twilight frowned at Rainbow, but still made her way to sit down on her seat at the conference table.</p><p>“So what is it?” you inquired.</p><p>“The Evil Detector!” shouted Twilight, dramatically pulling away the sheet in front of her to reveal a white crystal ball.</p><p>Everyone gasped in shock.</p><p>“How does it work?” you asked.</p><p>“You touch it and it will flash either red or blue. Blue for good, red for evil.” Twilight touched it with her hoof, and the device responded by flashing blue for a brief moment.</p><p>Twilight passed the device along to Rarity, who then passed it on to Starlight, who in turn past it to Pinkie Pie, and then Rainbow Dash.</p><p>All of which the device flashed blue for them.</p><p>Now, it was your turn. You reached your right hand out, meeting a soothing warmth upon contact with the device. The device reacted to your touch with a sinister flash of red.</p><p>Everypony gasped in shock.</p><p>“What the fuck?!” you shouted.</p><p>“AAAAAAHHHHHH!” screamed Rarity.</p><p>“This can’t be!” shouted Twilight.</p><p>“Ah’ll go get the shotgun.” said Applejack.</p><p>“Nooooo!” shouted Rainbow, Starlight, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy.</p><p>All four mares jumped to your side of the table in your defence.</p><p>“I don’t believe it! I will not!” said Rainbow.</p><p>“I don’t believe it either.” said Starlight.</p><p>“Anon isn’t evil! My Pinkie Sense would of told me otherwise by now!” said Pinkie.</p><p>“Anon is very helpful with my animals. He can’t be evil! Plus I love his big cock.” said Fluttershy.</p><p>Twilight herself then jumped to your side.</p><p>“My device is not working properly. I don’t think you’re evil either Anon.”</p><p>“Thanks, Twilight. That means a lot.” you said, leaning over her to give her a tender kiss on the cheek.</p><p>"You're welcome." she said, blushing from your loving kiss.</p><p>Rarity stood up, pointing a hoof at you threateningly. “You have brainwashed them!”</p><p>“I don’t know what you’re talking about.” you said angrily.</p><p>“Anon, ya have took each one of these mares under the hay. Of course, they are brainwashed.” said Applejack.</p><p>“So consensual sex is evil, now?”</p><p>“Nah, but ya got godlike sexual endurance and have a penis even bigger than mah big brother’s big penis.”</p><p>“Yeah, but I only got that good since Twilight cast her magic on my junk! My penis was not made to fuck big fat pony butts. And why would you know so much about your brother’s cock?”</p><p>Applejack blushed, putting her hat over her face. “Ah’ve done things ah’m not proud of.”</p><p>“Applejack’s incest with her brother aside.” said Rarity calmly before shouting at you.”You won’t get away with this Anon! Just wait until all the other princesses hear about this!”</p><p>There came a ‘whoosh’ as Princess Celestia, Princess Luna, and Princess Cadence stepped through the automatic steel door behind them.</p><p>“WE STAND WITH ANON!” boomed Luna.</p><p>“As do I.” said Celestia.</p><p>“Anon is too good at sex to be evil.” said Cadence.</p><p>“Oh no, Equestria is doomed!" Rarity screamed.</p><p>“Rarity, all I want in life is to drink beer and to fuck big fat ponybooty. I have no other real ambition in life.”</p><p>“Ya lying! Ah bet ya going to install a harem dictatorship. Where ya sit around all day doing nothing but drinking beer and ploughing big fat pony butts all day long. And ya use your harem to enforce yer lordship over this land.”</p><p>Princess Celestia sighed deeply. “Applejack, Anon has been here for a year, and all he has really done is fuck mares for the most part for bits.”</p><p>“And I enjoy my work.” you said sincerely.</p><p>Applejack tossed a sack of bits on the table. “Give it to me hard partner.” she said, looking at you with bedroom eyes.</p><p>Rarity gasped in horror. “Applejack?! You can't be serious!”</p><p>“Look Rarity, clearly Anon is unstoppable.”</p><p>“How so?”</p><p>“Anon, has spent the last year ploughing pretty much every mare in sight all across Equestria. The guy has legions of mares at his disposal.”</p><p>“Hey, it's not my fault mares are so easy to fall in love with me!” you bellowed.</p><p>“Hey, we are not easy!” Applejack shouted, crossing her hooves.</p><p>You took out a carrot from your pocket. “Which one of you beautiful mares want this carrot?”</p><p>Every mare in the room gave you bedroom eyes and licked their lips.</p><p>Rarity shook her head.” Very well Anon, your romantic carrot feeding offer has won me over. Just please, be gentle Anon and treat me like a proper gentle stallion.”</p><p>You stood up, making your way over to her. Once there, you kneeled down and gently took hold of her right hoof in your hand, and left a tender kiss upon it.</p><p>Rarity blushed, smiling broadly.</p><p>“You know what Anon, evil is sexy.”</p><p> </p><p>---------</p><p> </p><p>Meanwhile in another universe, in which Equestria was a very different place. The land in general was coated in black volcanic rock and the sky was the color of blood... red. Volcanoes were a common sight in this Equestria, which were gently pouring out lava in a continuous stream, forming great rivers of molten rock. Despite the hellish landscape, life still seemed to exist. There were forests with blood red leaves, and farms, towns and villages across the land.</p><p>A particularly large volcano was in the middle of Equestria. A huge, evil looking black stone castle stood near the peak of the volcano. Sharp spikes protruded along the crenelations of the castle. The guards ponies of this universe consisted of them wearing heavy plate, black armor, covered in small spikes. They were armed with black halberds instead of spears. The helmet they wore over their head was in the shape of a pony’s skull and it had glowing red eyes.</p><p>Within the conference room of the castle Queen Twilight Sparkle’s loyal allies (except for Spike, he was off doing something, nothing important) awaited patiently for her to announce her latest invention, while they sat around a black stone table, with a glowing red map of Equestria.</p><p>You were sat on Spike’s chair at the conference table, dressed in a finely polished, black heavy plate armor. Rainbow Dash was sat nearby on your right flank. Followed by; Pinkie Pie, Starlight, Rarity, Applejack. And then finally Fluttershy, who was sat on your left side. Each of your allies were battle scarred, and wore heavy plate armor.</p><p>Just in front of Twilight’s seat on the opposite side of the conference table to you was what appeared to be a small, soccer ball like object covered in a black sheet.</p><p>“We should be killing our enemies! Not sitting around here doing nothing.” complained Rainbow.</p><p>“Fear not, she will be here in exactly one second.” said Pinkie Pie with a jamaican man’s accent for some reason.</p><p>Everyone turned around as there came a ‘whoosh’ sound when an automatic, black steel door slid open to reveal none other than Queen Twilight Sparkle, who was wearing a white lab coat.</p><p>"Bad NEWS, EVERYPONY!” shouted Princess Twilight, trotting in with her two front hooves raised high in the air for a brief moment. “I’m about to announce my latest invention.”</p><p>“Well duh.” said Rainbow.</p><p>Twilight growled at Rainbow, but still made her way to sit down on her seat at the conference table.</p><p>“So, what is that you have made?” you inquired.</p><p>“The Good Detector!” shouted Twilight, dramatically pulling away the sheet in front of her to reveal a black crystal ball.</p><p>Everyone gasped in shock.</p><p>“How does this device work?” you asked.</p><p>“You touch it and it will flash either red or blue. Red for evil, blue for good.” Twilight touched it with her hoof, and the device responded by flashing red for a brief moment.</p><p>Twilight passed the device along to Rarity, who then passed it on to Starlight, who in turn past it to Pinkie Pie, and then Rainbow Dash. All of which the device flashed red for them.</p><p>Now, it was your turn. You reached your right hand out, meeting a chilling coldness upon contact with the device. The device reacted to your touch with a lovely flash of blue.</p><p>Everypony gasped in shock.</p><p>“No! It can’t be!” you shouted.</p><p>“HERESY!” screamed Rarity.</p><p>“This cannot be!” shouted Twilight.</p><p>“Ah’ll go get the executioner sword.” said Applejack.</p><p>“Nooooo!” shouted Rainbow, Starlight, Pinkie Pie, and Fluttershy.</p><p>All four mares jumped to your side of the table in your defense.</p><p>“Lies! Anon is brave and true!” shouted Rainbow.</p><p>“Indeed.” said Starlight.</p><p>“Anon isn’t good! My Good Sense would of told me otherwise by now!” said Pinkie.</p><p>“Anon is very helpful with my animals in my butcher shop. He can’t be good! Plus I love his big penis.” said Fluttershy.</p><p>Twilight herself then jumped to your side.</p><p>“My device must not be working properly. I don’t think you’re good either Anon.”</p><p>“You are forgiven, I trust this was a mistake on your part.” you said softly, leaning over her to give her a tender kiss on the cheek.</p><p>"Oh, you're welcome." she said, blushing from your loving kiss.</p><p>Rarity stood up, pointing a hoof at you threateningly. “You have corrupted them! You must be working with the good Princess Chrysalis!”</p><p>“I have no idea what you’re talking about.” you said angrily.</p><p>“Anon, ya have took each one of these mares under the blacksmith of yours. Of course, they are corrupted.” said Applejack.</p><p>“My blacksmith has crafted many a fine weapon for Equestria. So, what if I have sex with my allies while we craft weapons together?”</p><p>“Yes, ya have made some nice weapons for Equestria. But ya got godlike sexual endurance and have a penis even bigger than mah big brother’s big penis.”</p><p>“Yeah, but I only got that good since Twilight… the only pony I consider a friend took pity on me and showed me mercy when I first came here. When I was about to be executed by you she saved me and magically gave me a big penis to fuck big fat pony butts.”</p><p>“Oh Anon, you’re my friend too. I am going to grant you immortality.” said Twilight with tears of joy in her eyes.</p><p>”You won’t get away with this Anon! Just wait until all the other Queens hear about this!” shouted Rarity, pointing her hoof at you.</p><p>There came a ‘whoosh’ as Daybreaker, Nightmare Moon, and Queen Cadence stepped through the automatic steel door behind them.</p><p>“WE STAND WITH ANON!” boomed Nightmare Moon.</p><p>“So do I.” said Daybreaker.</p><p>“Anon is too good at sex to be good.” said Queen Cadence.</p><p>“Oh no, Equestria is doomed!" Rarity screamed.</p><p>“Rarity, have I not proven my loyalty to Equestria?”</p><p>“No, ya have not! Ya have turned Queen Twilight Sparkle soft. She never showed mercy to anyone before ya came here!”</p><p>Daybreaker sighed deeply. “Applejack, even I have shown mercy from time to time. Us ponies are not completely evil. I could, if I wanted to destroy all life on this planet. But… some of you are my friends. I am not totally heartless.”</p><p>“But… but Daybreaker.” Applejack said in a low voice, trembling.</p><p>“We suggest you give Anon an apology blowjob or I shall throw thee into a volcano.” said Nightmare Moon, taking a step toward her.</p><p>Applejack tossed a sack of bits on the table. “I plead for your forgiveness.” she said, looking at you with bedroom eyes.</p><p>“I want an apology hug instead of a blowjob.” you said softly.</p><p>Rarity gasped in horror. “An apology hug instead of an apology blowjob?! That’s heresy! Applejack?! Please, don’t do this!”</p><p>“Look Rarity, clearly Anon is unstoppable.”</p><p>“How so?”</p><p>“Anon is too powerful. He has slept with almost every mare in Equestria. So, he’s our new overlord whether we like it or not. Just look at him.”</p><p>Rarity looked over to see Anon petting Daybraker’s mane, despite her mane being made of fire his hand didn’t catch on fire. Daybraker moaned softly as he petted her.</p><p>“Anon, I’m sorry too.” Rarity said, giving you pleading doggy eyes.</p><p>“If you give me an apology hug all shall be forgiven.” you said softly, beckoning her over.</p><p>“Yes, my overlord.” she said, bowing deeply before you.</p>
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